October 9, 2018

Tuesdays With Tag - My Primer For Dogs...

Brynwood's Taggart

Hi, Everybody! 
Happy Tuesday from the farm.

Today, I'm launchin' a new subject for my blog posts. I'm callin' it my Primer For Dogs. (Mom told me that it's prounounced "primer", like "prim - er", not "prime - r", like the paint stuff.)  Anyway, I'm gonna write one to help dogs everywhere, whether they're young whippersnapper pups or old fart dogs. Some dogs may not have learned what knowledge I have to impart.

My subject this week is "The Art Of Drivin' Your People Nuts - Part One". This is somethin' that every single dog will love knowin'. I know it's served me like a charm...and Boo is even gettin' the hang of it from me! Go, Bella!

Barking Taggart

One thing that will drive your humans nuts is barkin'. I don't mean those cute, little "woofs", even though puppies have an inherent knowledge of them for wrappin' humans around their tiny paws from first exposure. I'm talkin' about the persistent, loud, percussive barks that I enjoy doin' while runnin' through every room on the main floor to be sure Mom and Dad heard me.

In this photo, I'm demonstratin' the typical pose as you begin to tighten up to deliver your initial barkin' fits. If you glance over your shoulder, you can actually see your humans tighten up as they start to sit a little straighter, and get ready to stop you from "singin' the song of your people".   (That means it's workin'!)

Gettin' Obnoxious

Next, you look your human(s) right in the eyes, and wind up for the serious mouthin' off. Mind you, there doesn't even really have to be anythin' there. You can double your impact if you bark like this at a closed door. Then they're wonderin' what's behind Door #1! (This can really be hilarious!)

Once you get up a good head of steam, you can actually start runnin' around the house again, like there's someone tryin' to get in. By now, you'll be gettin' some talkin' to, louder than you're usually used to. Just ignore it. You don't want to be distracted as you work your way though Barkin' Practice.

Enlistin' Partners In Crime

Of course, it's always fun to carry on solo, until you can get another dog from your household involved in the barkin'. That way, two dogs can get hollered at instead of just one. Mom and Dad are onto this tactic, though. You can't use it every time, because they'll catch onto the fact that you're instigatin' someone else to do your dirty work. I'm sorta like Huck Finn that way.

"Here, Bella. Come and see what's ____*_(fill in the blank)______ (* outside, runnin' around in the yard, you get the idea...). That ought to get her barkin' right away. Once she's goin', I can head back to our livin' room, climb into my bed, and watch as she barks until she gets reprimanded.

So, here's your assignment...Get yourself settled at home, and then, like it's out of the blue, start barkin' your brains out. See how your humans like it. You'll thank me later. Seriously! 

Well, this is the end of my first entry into the Primer For Dogs. There are gonna be more, and I'm pretty sure you know I've got about a million new ones. So, don't miss my Tuesdays With Tag posts, as you watch for more Primer For Dogs. I'm already workin' on the next one!

 I'll see you again in seven. 'til then...  
"Chase A Dream - Or A Squirrel".


3 friends clicked here to leave a note for me:

Unknown said...

Oh, dear Tag, wait until your momma reads this. You are in trrouuubbllleee! Better start practicing your 'I'm sorry look! Love, Auntie Julie

Sherri said...

LOL, that is exactly what our Emma does! Tag, she must have listened to your Primer :)!!

TerriSue said...

Dear Tag, I wish this would work in my house! It just doesn't. My momma read an article once about talking real soft to me when I bark. Supposedly I am supposed to escalate my barking as she escalates her telling me to be quiet. Instead she will pick me up and whisper to me. I can't hear what she is whispering if I am barking so I usually get quiet so I can hear what she is saying. She might be telling me where she keeps my favorite treats or something else just as important. Maybe I shouldn't be writing this to you. Your mom might read it. Ooops. Bitabit


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