She's On My Mind Today...

Mum with two great-grands - 2023

My mum turned 88 in June, and this photograph is from two years ago. She's much thinner and more frail-looking now. Recently her doctor(s) decided that she needed to undergo surgery. She's been having ongoing issues for a while now, and truthfully, I believe many of her problems are caused by the medicine on top of medicine on top of medicine she's been prescribed.

You know. First they tell you to take this pill, and when you have a reaction, they add a pill for that symptom, and so on and so on. Can you tell I don't really trust the people she's trusting? Well, the last prescription was a second prescription for diabetes. What it's causing is severe weight loss, and after reading up on all possible side effects, another is problems for the thyroid...from malfunction all the way up to the Big C. 

Her doctor convinced her to have a major surgery on her thyroid today. They've also said it's a day surgery! I've had two thyroid surgeries (one when I was 7 and the other when I was 18). I know what it does to a young, otherwise healthy person. I'm deeply concerned about what it may do to my 88 year old mother, and it's inconceivable to me that it could - under any stretch of the imagination - be a day surgery for her.

What that means for me is that I'll go to my PT appointment, and then spend the rest of the day waiting for word about how she is. One of my brothers is her medical surrogate (in the event my 93 year old stepdad can't be - or he hands off that responsibility). He and my sister, Jan will be at the hospital with our stepdad. I've had my fill of medical facilities, so I'll wait at home to hear from Jan.

I have a feeling it's going to be a long day. I hope you have something more fun on your agenda. See you tomorrow.

I've Got A New Attitude...

This is my knee as of Sunday afternoon.  I'm blessed to be a good healer, and this is no exception. However, it's been three weeks since my last post, and it sure hasn't been a cake walk. Handsome and I talked about it, and although he can think of one other long recuperation (I was in my 30s then), I think I can safely say this has been the hardest recovery in my life.

Everyone told me the first two weeks would be the worst, and I can concur. I was taking pain meds every four to six hours (along with an anti-nausea pill) and spent what time wasn't in physical therapy, icing and sleeping. I also did my home physical therapy to move the healing along, too.

This is a front and side view from last week's appointment with the surgeon's assistant. Everything is where it's supposed to be, and they're very happy with the results. I'm officially "left side bionic". The joint is secure and stable, and now it's just a matter of getting the musculature healed and mobile again.

My progress is right on schedule, too. They wanted me to be at 90º (for my knee bend) by that appointment, and I was already at 101º. I'm doing physical therapy three times a week, so by the next appointment I was at 107º, and by last Friday, I'd managed to exercise myself to 111º by the beginning of the appointment (rather than getting a measurement again at the end per usual). My therapist was really happy about it, and truthfully, so am I. Knowing how much they had to move things out of the way to install the new hardware, the muscles and tendons were traumatized. Even though they weren't damaged before or during, I still have to give myself some grace to heal everything. I have therapy again today, so we'll see what I managed to accomplish over the weekend. 

I haven't been able to sit at my needlework frame for multiple reasons. The main one being that I didn't want to stitch while heavily medicated, but I also wasn't comfortable sitting upright in my needlework chair. While I've recently graduated to a cane (which I rarely use in the house now), getting around with a walker before that wasn't conducive to being comfortable either. I thought it better to just resort to sleeping and healing.

Handsome has been a great nurse - even though we learned that he has his own issues now, too. He has a bone spur on his spine, so I tried to be mindful of his condition as he was taking care of me. Aren't we a pair, though? Although I couldn't do much to help the first two weeks, I've slowly been working my way back into the kitchen to take some of that burden off him.While there are no three or four-course dinners around here, he's happy that he isn't responsible for our evening menus anymore. 

Even so, he's been a wonderful caretaker, driving me to all my appointments; helping me in and out of our vehicles; and patiently waiting until he can take me home again. That's not even mentioning all he's done for us around the house. He really is the best, and I'm so grateful.

Finally, thank you to those who reached out, sent cards and gifts prayed, and held healing thoughts for me. I think you know by now just how much that means to me. I know it's been a minute since I last posted (July 22nd to be exact, but who's counting - as I raise my own hand), but you're still here, and I awfully blessed and appreciative. 

Thanks from the bottom of my heart. See you again tomorrow.

We Have Clearance, Clarence...

If you're ever offered a recreational, chemically-induced stress test, take a hard pass. That's what I had yesterday. The first IV injection was easy. The second came with warnings of "possible shortness of breath, chest pains, headache, dizziness or fainting, or nausea". I thought to myself, "I'm not going to get any of those. I'm not a hypochondriac." Didn't matter, as I had no control over it. I got every. single. one.  Good thing I was lying down.  

The tech told me beforehand the antidote for that injection was caffeine. (Guess that's why they said I couldn't have any for at least 24 hours before the test.) He asked me first whether I'd prefer pepsi, coffee or hot chocolate. Guess which one I chose. (Hint: chocolate) As soon as they completed the test, he handed me a steamy cup of delicious hot coco. All my symptoms calmed almost immediately, and by the time I was ready to leave, there was just the faintest hint of a headache. Before Handsome and I turned for home, he stopped at a Kwik Trip and grabbed coffee for each of us. By the time we drove up the driveway, my head was clear again. (Small blessings)

I went inside the house, changed clothes and spent the next half hour napping in the sun. Then I came in for a little needle therapy. I mostly stitched my base colors, and plan to go back at it today with the other shading. Or, I may continue with all the base and go back in later to do the shading at one time. We'll see. If all goes well, I'm hoping to make serious headway on the fencing though.

I didn't find out until late afternoon, but the cardiologist reviewed all yesterday's tests and cleared me for surgery. So, I'm now good to go for my new knee next week. What a relief! I'll be able to relax a bit more over the weekend now that I know. 

There are a few things I need to do prior to Monday. I'll bake some more bread for the freezer, and probably do a couple loads of laundry. But mostly, I plan to stitch. I'm not going to stress over finishing the fence. If I don't get it done, I'll have it waiting for me once I'm feeling more myself post-op. We'll see how far I get, and I'll let you have a peek on Monday.

Definitely having my morning cuppa today, though! Hope you have a wonderful weekend. See you later.

Not So Fast, Boys and Girls...

Whelp. Yesterday did not go as planned. My optimistic self figured we'd meet with the cardiologist, he'd look at the MRI and EKG results and concur with previous opinions that I could just "skate" into my knee surgery as scheduled. I was soooo wrong.

Instead, he is requiring that I undergo stress testing (chemical, because my knees wouldn't handle physical ones) before he'll clear me for surgery. Because time is of the essence (surgery scheduled for Tuesday next), we had to juggle previous appointments to add in the stress tests. 

Rather than having my post-op consult with the surgeon's assistant today, I'll be undergoing multiple stress tests. If I can't get in to see the assistant this afternoon because of her other commitments, we'll have to drive up on Monday, and then again on Tuesday. That is, if the cardiologist clears me for surgery. He listed a long set of circumstances under which he might not clear me. Mainly, because he wants to be completely sure I don't have a heart attack on the table. He said, "Brain before heart. Heart before knees." I know he's looking out for my well-being, but dang it!

Understand, I only had intermittent clues that there might be anything going on with my heart. I thought they were related to a mechanical device which had been implanted for bladder control (Sorry. TMI), and that was removed a few months ago because I didn't need it, and the doctor thought it might be causing the palpitations. I get an occasional flutter now, but no fatigue (that isn't related to my legs right now), no fainting, and no other symptoms. I left yesterday's appointment in tears. I'm so past waiting for my knee replacement that the thought of a delay really upset me.

Well, I'm on my way back to the clinic this morning and will undergo these tests. I'm going to be as optimistic as I possibly can be, and the cardiologist will give us his analysis before we leave the clinic today. I should know by lunchtime whether or not I'll be getting my knee replacement next week, or have to have more done for my heart.

No morning cuppa today...in fact nothing remotely containing caffeine for twenty four hours prior to these tests, so that's been weird, too. As soon as I'm released today, I'm heading downstairs to their cafeteria for a cup of coffee and a candy bar! I'll give you the results tomorrow. On my way out the door now. Wish me luck!

We Have A Date...

Vintage Baking Image via Internet

I baked yesterday to stock up for later this month. I made bread and tried a new recipe for molasses cookies - all while I was busy answering the phone all day with upcoming appointment dates.

Seems I have a surgery date - pending clearance from the cardiologist. Tomorrow is my echocardiogram. Then, I have a new pre-op physical therapy appointment; an appointment with the cardiologist to go over the echo results (and hopefully be cleared for surgery); another pre-op consult with the surgeon's office; all leading up to my surgery date the week of July 21st. It's going to get a little busy around here.

In the meantime, I'm going to be doing more baking; making a few "thaw, heat ,and serve" meals for the freezer; and a little more home prepping for when I'm recuperating. I'm not forgetting about my bluebirds, either. Working on the fence embroidery will keep my mind occupied as I get closer to the day of the operation. It's okay, though. I'm getting anxious to get this over with to let the healing begin. Waiting is the hardest part, I think.

Lots to do today, so I'm going to enjoy my morning cuppa and then set about my tasks. Have a great day, and I'll see you again tomorrow.

Tail WIP...

I began work on this in the morning, and then had to stop after about four hours to get to my new doctor appointment. (Yes. This is all I accomplished in four hours.) I did a little more when we got back home, but decided to leave the rest for daylight.

I've begun with the outline for the legs, but what's shown will be the padding for the actual stitching to give the legs and feet dimension. I'll pad them out a bit more, but just needed to get the placement before I completed the feathers.

I'm at work interpreting again this morning, so after I get home (and take a nap) I'll work on it again. I'm happy with the progress so far, though.

About my doctor's appointment...seems my little voice (and Handsome) came through again. In conversation with this doctor, it seems that my "knee parts" would not have done well with a repair procedure. Osteoarthritis is already causing bone issues, and the meniscus - if successfully repaired - would have failed again soon without a viable anchor. Considering the recuperation for the repair would have been 6-8 weeks non-weight bearing, it would have all been for nothing in the long run.

I really like this doctor. He answered all our questions thoroughly, and is confident a replacement will serve me 25-30 years. Our plan is to do the injured leg first, and the other one about twelve weeks later. He expects full recovery and a return to my former mobility...pain-free. Plus, this procedure will have me up and walking the same day. Of course, there will be initial pain, physical therapy, and work on my part, but then I'll be good to go.

We're going to wait to schedule surgery until after my echocardiogram on the 11th, so we have a safe "go ahead" from the cardiologist. I should get a call from the scheduler this week. I'll pick a date as close to that as possible. I'm tired of walking like a penguin in pain, and now I can see a real bright future for my mobility.

In the meantime, I'm going to finish a few projects, and get my head in a healing mindset. I've got this!

Settled...

Just like these two ladies - my former barn cats - we've made some decisions and are completely settled in with them. Let me get you up to date.

Thursday was an eye-opening day for me. It began with EKG results that I now know were interpreted by the machine and not a cardiologist. Even so, it opened my eyes to my own vulnerability. 

Then, I had an appointment immediately following the EKG with the physician's assistant for the surgeon who would be performing my meniscus repair. There, I was introduced to the piece of hardware that would lock my leg into position for approximately six to eight weeks. Not only would my leg be immobilized, but I would be required to keep my weight off it for that period of time.

The last appointment was with the physical therapist, who took baseline measurements of my current physical status relating to my legs...one in need of more immediate repair, and the other, bone-on-bone. After she measured my current range of motion, etc., she handed me a pair of crutches (the preferred method of post-op motivation) and had me walk as far as I could, keeping that one leg elevated to mimic the post-op requirement. I managed to crutch twenty five feet, at which point my non-surgical leg said, "Nope. This is not a good idea for six or eight weeks." I didn't say that to the therapist, but at that point, I remembered the first office visit with the orthopedist when he told me that "I could be putting my non-injured leg at risk as I recuperated from surgery on the other one". We also discussed wheelchairs (not really an option for the house, as the floorplan and doorways are not "wheelchair friendly"), and walkers. All options, save for the wheelchair, would require me to keep my weight off the surgical leg and put all my faith in the other.

Handsome and I had a long discussion before bed that night, and he told me to seriously reconsider this surgery and contemplate a knee replacement instead, one benefit being that I'd be able to immediately put it down and walk on it. I went to bed and slept fitfully all night as I thought about it.

I woke up yesterday morning and decided the first thing I should do is have an appointment with a cardiologist to get a factual interpretation of the EKG, getting another test done, if necessary. Then, I talked again with Handsome and said there's every possibility that I could go through months of post-op rehab for the repair, and still need a replacement after that, AND do more harm than good to my other leg, which I know will require a replacement. 

The upshot of all this is to say I called all the entities involved in the upcoming surgery and rehabilitation and canceled everything. I'm going to get an appointment with my primary care provider and get the required referral to the cardiologist my husband goes to. Once I have clearances, explanations, or diagnosis, my next appointments will be with an orthopedist who does replacements. (My current ortho is the only one in the clinic who only does repairs. All the others also do replacements.) 

So, for now, I'm back to square one, but like those two comfy, lazy, content girls in the pictures above, I'm going to sleep like a baby, knowing I've made the best choice for my health, and truthfully, Handsome's, too. I'm going to relax this weekend, as opposed to us moving our house around to accommodate that surgery and my recovery. Then, on Monday, I'll make calls to move forward.

I'm off the work schedule for the next two weeks, which leaves me plenty of options for dates for appointments. I'll know more by the time the next schedule comes out, so I may or may not be on that calendar, either. This should leave me plenty of time to work on bluebirds and puffins, too! Yay to that!

A Little Glitch...

Image via Joy Blossoms

 

I spent the better part of half a day with doctors and tests yesterday. This morning, I have another unplanned appointment with another doctor, closer to home. 

Seems my EKG caused some concern, so I'm going to have to get clearance from another doctor before we can go ahead with my surgery next week. Not what I'd hoped for at all.

I got to try walking around, one-legged, on crutches; using a walker, again one leg only (oh, joy); and getting fitted for the hardware that will keep my surgery leg straight for my recovery time. As I'm not allowed more than "toe-touch" for that entire time, we also discussed that I should consider a wheelchair for longer distances to protect my right leg, which is the one that's bone-on-bone. I'm going to have to rely on that one while the left (with the torn meniscus) heals. 

It was after 5 pm when I drove into our yard. Which is to say, I wasn't home. I didn't stitch. I didn't play. I was tired when I got back. I did however, make four batches of rhubarb scones to put in the freezer overnight. I've made them as a thank you to my boss and two co-workers who are covering my hours until after this appointment today. It appears my last day for at least six weeks will only be a half day.

I'm leaving for the doctor's office soon, and then going to work. Wish me luck. At this point, I'm not sure which I want more. An approval for surgery and the six to twelve weeks of recuperation, or a veto, which means I'd be on two sore knees until I decide to go with total replacements (which is the only option for my right leg). I'm going to take a deep breath, not look under rocks, and wait to see what the expert says.

I'll let you know tomorrow. 

I Have A Date...

Artwork by SamCannonArt

I finally got a call from the surgical schedule department at the clinic. My surgery is now set for Monday, June 23rd. My mum's birthday. I'll be going in some time before noon, and will have the exact time when the hospital calls me next week.

In the meantime, I'll have a day next week that I'll meet with the physical therapy department so I know what to expect of the four weeks of PT (which we always referred to as "pain and torture" when Son #2 had to go through it as a kid), a pre-op EKG, and something else I forget right now. 

My last day of work will be June 20th, until I'm cleared to go back. I'm going to miss my favorite customers and coworkers, but this comes first, and my boss is really supportive. She was willing to give me the time off beforehand because she knows I have a constant Level 10 on the pain scale, but I explained that I have that no matter what I'm doing, so I may as well be contributing at work for the next three assigned days. We have new hires right now that will be able to pick up the slack while I'm gone, and I'm very grateful for that.

I have things that I want to accomplish prior to the surgery, including setting up my space downstairs with my needlework supplies so I can stitch once I feel up to it. There are other things I need to set up before surgery, too. Bake bread for the freezer, set up a few meals "ready to eat" for us, and a bit of laundry. Don't worry. I promise not to overdo. I still want to protect this knee so I don't do further damage before surgery.

I'm actually looking forward to this. Not only will it move this injured knee toward healing, but I'm happy to just be home and doing not much for a change.

I'll pre-write a few posts so that if I'm not quite up to it, you'll have some messages from me. I'm going to do a puffin spoolie next; get my June artist trading cards done; and work on my bluebirds. That should keep me busy, right?

I'm going to get started pulling things together today...after my morning cuppa. I'll tell you more about what I'm going to be working on tomorrow.

On The Bright Side...

I'll have plenty of time to complete my bluebirds - and a few other projects! We had the appointment with the orthopedist yesterday and here's the news:

1) The meniscus is, in fact, severely torn on one side. The doctor likened it to a tree that's been uprooted. My meniscus is not attached to anything on the outer side of my knee joint, and as such is trying to squeeze itself out of the joint completely. This is bad.

2) I have the beginnings of arthritis in the joint (already in my other knee), and that can be addressed along with the tears.

3) The inner side of the joint also has a slight tear, but is thankfully still attached to the bone. It's a minor repair.

4) There is also a buildup of fluid trying to exit the back of the joint, causing some of the constant Level 10 pain I'm experiencing.

5) Post arthroscopic surgery recovery time with only toe-touch weight on that leg, is approximately TWELVE WEEKS. That would include post-op crutches and physical therapy.

I have three choices, only two of which are viable. 1) Do nothing. Not an option. 2) Full knee replacement. I'm not a fan of the option, even though I'm told that's now the only option for my other knee. and 3) arthroscopic surgery to repair the tears with about an 80% success rate.

I'm waiting for a phone call from the scheduling office to set the date for a pre-op physical therapy appointment, as well as the surgery date. I'm told that the longer I wait to do this, the more damage can occur in the joint. If the meniscus completely breaks free, it can't be saved. I'll be bone-on-bone on both knees with no other options but replacement. So, I'll be scheduling this asap.

I called my boss tonight to drop the news. She's wonderful. She said, "Don't worry about us. We'll figure it out. You need to take care of you and then heal." She assured me there will be a job waiting for me if I choose to go back...which I'd definitely do for her.

As the stairs in the farmhouse will likely be an issue for a while, we'll probably set up my smaller farmhouse bed in Handsome's downstairs office to avoid them altogether as I heal. We'll see if we can get help to move the bed down from the attic and set it up in the next week or so. I'll move some clothes downstairs, too, to make life easier all around.

The best possible news - the bright side - is that it appears I'll have lots of time for my needlework. I'll finish this bluebird project, make more spoolies, and also update my Etsy shop with new items for sale.  That means I'll also bring some supplies downstairs so I'm fully prepared for a little leisure time once the surgery is accomplished. 

I'll probably know the date before the weekend, so I'll also have time to make the other preparations. I think it's gonna be a little bumpy for us for a while, but like we always say, "It's what we do." We'll handle this as well.

Handsome is already feeling better, but he saw the doctor yesterday, too. He's scheduled for an MRI next week. The doctor will see him after that appointment, and once we know exactly what's causing this, we can look to help him to be pain-free.

Hope this all wasn't too boring for you, my friends. I don't want you to worry about me. We'll get this all figured out, and in the meantime, I'll be treating my knee with the utmost care to avoid further damage. I guess when I have an accident, I manage to go all in. I keep shaking my head at my rotten luck, but I'll continue to look to the bright side. It can be fixed, and as I'm a really good healer, I'm confident this will heal better than the statistics. We've got this, but prayers are always appreciated. You already knew that, right? Thank you in advance.

I have a baking order to fulfill today. I'm going to be busy, but careful. I promise. I'll show you what I accomplish tomorrow. Thanks again!

Trying To Stay Positive...

 

I'm trying really hard to stay positive, but pain does weird things to a person. I'm sharing this photo again to show you at least one of my knees. It's swollen, and that's the good one. The more recently injured one is much more swollen and red.

The knee that you can see is the knee that's bone-on-bone, meaning there is no cartilage left in the knee joint. I favored it for a few years until I had my silly accident in February. February 7th, to be exact. That's the day the new dog bed arrived from Amazon, and the day I severely twisted my knee trying to place the bed just right in the living room for the dogs. The dogs never used the bed in the living room, by the way. When I finally took it away because it was just taking up useless space, it went into the back seat area of Handsome's truck where the girls love it! Anyway, that's how I know the exact date.

I kept thinking my twisted knee would heal and feel better, but it hasn't. My "bad" knee became my "good" knee, and it's been the stronger of the two for getting me up and down stairs, or for anything else I needed to do. We do what we have to when we need to. (Hmmmm. Perhaps I should embroider that on a shirt?)

After Handsome got back from Florida, I made the first appointment with an orthopedist. He suspected a torn meniscus because of the way it was injured. I was sent home with meds and an appointment for an MRI. That appointment had to be cancelled because I had a device in my hip that precluded the test. My most recent surgical procedure was to remove that device because it was causing its own set of issues, so I was then able to reschedule the MRI. As you know, that happened on Monday.

I decided to check my health care "portal" last night, to find that the MRI results are back. I'm not doctor, but I can understand enough to know that there's no way I'm going to be able to avoid surgery on the knee I injured. The report also completely explains why I've been in such terrible pain since the accident. I did purchase a set of bamboo fabric compression sleeves, which have been an immense help when I'm working or know I'll be on my feet for a longer period of time, but the pain never really goes away. No medicine helps either, by the way, so I take Tylenol when it's nearly unbearable to bring it back to a bearable level.

Handsome and I meet with the doctor this afternoon, and then I'll get all of this explained in layman's terms. I know I'm not going to be happy, but I also know something needs to be done soon. Pain can make a person ugly (at least on the inside), and I fear it will make me ugly on the outside if it's not handled. So, once again, we'll do what's required. I'll let you know the details after I hear them today. 

All Is Well...

Hickory Hill Farm - Lily ©2024

Just a quick check-in to let you know that everything went really well yesterday. The surgical team loved the jokes I told so I could drift off to la la land listening to their laughter. The anesthesiologist said he'd definitely be repeating them. My doctor even told me a joke when he came into my room for the pre-op consult! He had us laughing out loud, and I told him I'd be telling that one again, too.

Surgery began exactly at the 7:15 scheduled time, and Handsome and I were back in the farmhouse by noon. I've only been up long enough to have a bite to eat for dinner, and then write this post. Sleep is how I heal best, so I'm going back to bed as soon as I sign off here. 

Thank you all for the prayers and good wishes. I know you know just how much they're appreciated. I'm actually feeling good, except that I'm groggy from the anesthesia and the one pain pill they gave me before I left. Tylenol should cover it for Friday. I'm extremely grateful for the skilled hands and excellent care given to me by the entire team at BayCare Hospital in Green Bay. Everlasting gratitude to Handsome, too. I couldn't do any of this without him.

I'm heading back to bed now and if I'm up to it, I'll work on my new spoolie during the day. (Hint: You'll roar when you see this one.) Otherwise, I'll spend one more day sleeping. I know you understand. Hugs.

Here's What Happened To Me...

 

Let me begin by saying that this is a rather delicate issue, but I want you to understand what the past three years and multiple surgeries has been about. In the process, I may help another with similar issues avoid the problems I've had. Mainly, by imparting some information that can be used to get the right person for the job. I'm hoping that where I seem a little vague (for modesty's sake), you'll understand what I'm trying to say.

In June of 2020, I went to the same orthopedist Handsome had gone to for his knee replacement. Once he looked at my knee, he suggested physical therapy to which I responded that I had an issue common in women, fearing I'd be a wet mess if I tried to do anything too physical for my knee. He recommended I see his colleague and friend - a urologist - to see about getting some relief. So, I left his office and made an appointment with his colleague.

Handsome attended the appointment with me, and I discussed a possible solution might be to install a "sling". I'd talked to multiple girlfriends who'd had the procedure, and they all swore by it. He agreed and scheduled me for surgery. 

 

Now, before I go further, I now know that he should have done a series of tests first to assess just how bad my condition was, but I didn't know that at the time. He scheduled me for a surgery on July 23, 2020.

The surgery was a day procedure, so I knew I'd be going home that afternoon. We got to the hospital first thing in the morning, and when it was getting close to checkout time, the nurse said I needed to void on my own before I could leave. I realized then that I had heavy bleeding - unexpected by anything I'd been cautioned about pre-op - so I asked the nurse why? She told me that the doctor would explain, but there had been "complications".

I didn't see the doctor before leaving, but Handsome had the whole story, which he told me on our way home. When the doctor went to tighten the sling, it broke. So he cut the anchor attachments (leaving them in place), removed the sling, and proceeded to install a second one - even though he said he knew it would cause me some trauma.

When he went to tighten the second sling, it also broke. Soooo, rather than quit there, he informed Handsome (after the fact) that there was one more sling in the hospital. He again cut the anchors (also leaving them behind), removed the second sling, and then installed a third one...which he didn't tighten because he was afraid it would break. At that point, I have one loose sling and six anchors in place...and he sent me home.

I was soon in great pain, taking the medicine he sent home with us, but the pain grew worse and persisted. We called multiple times and he said to continue with the pain meds and he'd see me in two weeks. In the meantime, I was unable to sit up straight at all. I had to shift from one hip to the other, or be completely prone.  I spent most of my time in bed. The pain was akin to what you might remember from childhood if you ever fell forward on the bar of your bicycle - times ten. It was excruciating.

We saw him after two weeks, and he said I was "healing nicely", but he may have to send me to a specialist to determine why I was in pain. This persisted for seven weeks, until he finally referred me to a urogynechologist in Green Bay.

When the specialist examined me, he said he could palpate the slipped sling and one of the anchors, and the best thing would be to remove everything, get me out of pain, and start at square one. We scheduled that surgery for September 11, 2020. When I came out of the surgery, I was immediately out of pain. He told us he removed five of the six anchors (one was high up and he didn't want to risk doing more damage. It could stay safely where it was), part of a remnant sling that had been left behind, and the slipped sling. So, everything except one anchor had been removed. 

Rather than go into every sordid detail, I'll fast forward a bit. The sling had done more damage than just pain. It had been resting on my bladder nerve, so I now had a spastic bladder and permanent damage to the "piping". It means that whenever I moved it was like priming a pump, and there was no function to stop the flow. I essentially went from a couple light days to 9-10 heavy weight pads a day, and overnight coverage as well.

When that first specialist had medical issues of his own that kept him out of the office for months, I was referred to a female specialist in Milwaukee-area. She was also wonderful, and was candid that the first guy really messed up...a fact that the first specialist agreed with. Nevertheless, we went through tests, and multiple procedures in an effort to find some relief for me. This condition was stealing my life from me. I couldn't go swimming, hunting with Handsome, or even shopping. I'd be wet through to my clothes before I could get back home - even if I made stops along the way. I tried to deal with my condition with humor, but truthfully, it was stealing my joy every minute of the day and night.

Procedure (Surgery) #7 was to install an Interstim unit to try to control the bladder spasms. It's a battery-operated unit installed in the back of my hip with a lead wire that runs along the nerve for my bladder. It definitely worked, but it was causing me to get cramps in my leg, and the dang battery unit pinches if I move wrong. I'm always aware it's there. Note here that Surgery #3-6 were to try other options. A different sling, a bulking procedure to narrow down the "piping", etc.

When I found out that my first specialist was back to his practice, I contacted him. He spoke with the Milwaukee specialist and they compared notes. More than anything, he wanted to do his best to reverse the damage done by the urologist who did the first botched surgery. I made an appointment for more tests and then he sat down with Handsome and me for a discussion. He told us I was an enigma. Everything he and the other specialist had done should have helped me at each stage of the process, but it hadn't. I had one viable option left to me.

We decided that he would perform another surgery - to install an obstructive sling. That means I was agreeing to a procedure that would likely require that I self-catheterize for the rest of my life...but I'd be dry. I could take control again. Handsome and I discussed it and we agreed to go ahead with the surgery. That's the procedure that was done on August 29th of this year...just over three years since The Troubles began.

 

Since the surgery, I've been doing everything the doctor told me I need to do. No lifting over five pounds (almost everything weights over five pounds!), rest, and concentrate on healing. I came home with a supply of catheters (I'd been trained to use them two years ago), and prepared for my new way of life. 

Imagine my surprise - and confusion - when I found that I didn't need to catheterize. Did something go wrong? Did I do something I wasn't supposed to? Was this another failure? Then I stopped to assess. There was no leaking. THERE WAS NO LEAKING! Oh, I forgot to tell you. The Interstim was turned off for the surgery, and the doctor told me to leave it off to see how things went without it. There were no spasms in the ensuing days either.

I saw the doctor yesterday. I wore a dress to our appointment - a fact that didn't go unnoticed by his nurse. She also commented on the big smile on my face, when all our other appointments had been tearful. We went in to the exam room and she asked how everything was going, and I told her. The first thing she said was, "Well, I won't be doing the "Don't worry. It's too early to tell yet." speech." Now she was smiling, too. She left the room and came back with the doctor.

He had me sit in the "funny chair" so he could do an exam and remove my stitches/staples. (ouch) Then, we talked. He's cautiously optimistic, but what Handsome and I realized was that this is what he'd been hoping for all along. While I was focused on having to self-cath the rest of my life - he'd given me the worst-case scenario. What he didn't tell me was that things might return to normal and none of that would be necessary. So far, that's the case.

I'll see him again in eight weeks, and in the meantime, I'm going to continue to do exactly what I've been doing since the surgery - minding my "p"s and "q"s, and following his orders to the letter. I may have only one proceedure left - to remove the Interstim, which still hasn't been turned on, and he said I should leave off for now. As I continue to heal, we'll find out whether or not I need it at all in the future. Another point: If you've looking to have a procedure like this - which I'd still recommend to anyone going through what I was at the start - PLEASE go to a urogynecologist...someone who specializes in women's issues.

 

I seriously can't stop smiling. I'm hoping that if optimism and a sunny outlook affect healing, that they will help carry me to the best possible resolution to three years of hell. 

 

Now, if you're wondering...yes. I spoke with multiple lawyers. We agreed that we had a case, but after Medicare got repaid, the lawyers took their cut, and incidentals were covered, there may not be anything left for us. Wisconsin has a cap on malpractice awards, and adjudication may take up to another three years of my life. We agreed not to sue.

 

Instead, I've filed a complaint with the Wis. Medical Board, who will do a thorough review of the entire first surgery and how that doctor conducted himself. He should have done tests first. He didn't. He shouldn't have used the type of sling he chose (according to the two specialists), he never should have installed anything after the first sling broke, and he left me in pain way too long without relief. These are the things that will be reviewed by the board, and from what I was told by our lawyer, he's going to feel like he's gone to a proctologist with large, rough hands. 

As for me, I'm going to continue to heal, live my happy life here at the farmhouse, and have faith that God and a gifted surgeon have given my life back to me. I hope this hasn't been a TMI post for you. Truthfully, it's been cathartic for me to write about it. What little modesty I had before all this started, completely disappeared over three years of being poked, prodded, examined, and tested. I guess the fact that I'm even putting this into words is proof of that. 

 

I'll likely know as the weeks go by whether or not I continue to improve, but I'm looking forward to having a bona fide confirmation in eight weeks from my now favorite doctor. I have a feeling this is the fix we've been praying for. As always, I'll ask that you continue lifting healing prayers for me. Thanks for reading to the end. I feel like I should have a prize waiting for you just for slogging through this entire post! (Maybe I'll have to do something special for anyone who comments. You just never know. Stay tuned.)

Healing...

 

I'm not sure there's ever a good time for a surgery, but right now I'm looking at a garden, filled with ripening tomatoes and squash blossoms and I have to wonder what I was thinking? My blog has been on auto-pilot for the past few days, so that's why you haven't had responses to your comments since Monday.

Handsome and I left home on Tuesday morning at 5 am for a 6:45 check-in time at the hospital in Green Bay, and I had Surgery #8 related to what Handsome refers to as The Troubles. My doctor said everything went perfectly, and now we wait to see how I heal. You see, he recently called me "an enigma" because any one of Surgeries #3-7 (not all performed by him) should have worked and didn't. I did everything I was told to do by the professionals, yet my body said, "Wait a sec. I have a different idea." I'm praying that this time will be the last time, and that my body will heal as it should, and The Troubles will be over.

 

We're both grateful to my little sister, Jan, who came down on Monday to spend the night and next day tending dogs and cats so we needn't worry about how long they were kenneled, or if they'd get fed. She took care of all that for us, and really eased our minds. Thanks, JJ. xoxo

It's been a long three years since this began and I'm ready to move on from it. Right now, I'm sore with a long incision across my "bikini line" (something I haven't actually worn in decades) and a line of stitches and staples to hold things in place until they can be removed in a couple weeks. I have a five pound lifting restriction for the next twelve weeks, and I'm going to follow that to the letter. Handsome is currently bagging tomatoes for the freezer, and I'll get to them when I get to them. It looks like I'll have to cancel my booth for the September show, and possibly the one in November as well. I'm really bummed about that development.

For now, I'm sore whether I stand, sit or am prone. Coughing can send me into fits of pain, and I spend a lot of time being coddled. I don't mind that, but you must know by now that it's not my usual modus operandi.

I promise to share the facts of how I got to this point at a later date, but for now, I'm going to beg your indulgence and head back to bed. I've been reading your comments, but it's impossible to respond from my phone, so I'll sit at my computer tomorrow and answer as many as I can from this week. I have read them all, so I apologize for leaving you hanging. I love and miss you and will be back soon.

No Housekeeping...

Brynwood Needleworks via Facebook

Each day is a little bit better in my healing. Still no creative endeavors...pain killers and needles don't mix well. This is how I feel about housekeeping right now. Housekeeping is a definite "no".

The only unexpected turn was that when I came home, Handsome informed me that he's been having trouble since Sunday, but didn't want to tell me because he knew I'd back out of my surgery to take care of him. (He was right.) So, two nights ago he went to the hospital ER for tests. They determined he has another blockage and admitted him that night. He feels awful that I'm here alone (with the dogs).

I've had family and dear friends stopping in to help with the few things I can't do for myself, and when I'm alone, I sleep a lot. We're hoping Handsome can come home today, but I won't know until a little later. 

 

Have I said I'm sick of 2020? Yes. I'm pretty sure I have.

A Little Wrinkle...

Brynwood Needleworks - My Great-niece, "Lady M"

 

Last weekend, my great-niece (one of my nephew, Dan's twin girls), cut a face for my camera. I'm sharing it for today's post, because it's the way I feel these days.

 

I've continued to be in pain since the elective surgery I had on July 23rd, so I not only went back to my doctor this week, but was also squeezed into the schedule of a specialist. That appointment was on Thursday.

 

After a period of discussion, and a thorough examination, it was determined that I should have another surgery to reverse the previous one. Doing so will remove the cause of my persistent pain. After a recuperation period, we'll have another appointment, and review my medical options. The surgery has been scheduled for next Friday - 9/11 - with restrictions for at least two weeks (again) post-op. 

I spent yesterday baking bread, and will be baking again today to stock the freezer, as I plan ahead for this wrinkle in my September. I'd planned to go to the Farmer's Market today, but have been restricted to staying home and away from crowds so I'm not inadvertently exposed to Covid-19 prior to the procedure. So, I'll do my homekeeping tasks (baking, laundry, and the like) while I'm able, and stay here at the farmhouse. I'm also going to set up a few needlework projects ahead of time, to keep myself busy while I'm healing.

I just thought I'd share this information so you won't wonder why my posts might be a little vague in the short-term. This next week will be spent tying up loose ends, getting out orders, and planning my handwork projects. I'm thinking I should get some Fall projects together to work on.

It's hard to believe it's already Labor Day Weekend. In Wisconsin, that's traditionally been the end of summer; the end of wearing white clothing; and the time to put away the lawn furniture. I'm a die-hard about keeping the lawn furniture in place until well after first frost. There's still plenty of time for campfires, s'mores, and enjoying the outdoors. I'm going to make the most of it all.

No Dancing For A While...

I've been a little lot side-tracked the past six weeks. Because I think there's

an important message that should be shared here, I'd like to tell you about it.

On April 17th, I had my regular, annual checkup. 

I'd been feeling great so I expected everything to be routine and uneventful. 

It was the beginning of many scary days for Handsome and me.

My regular doctor is a wonderful woman who is a family practitioner in Venice. I've been her patient for five years, so she knows me and my medical history pretty well by now.  She can do my "girly" stuff once a year, but if I get a cold, she can treat that, too, which I like. I also like that she always takes her time during our appointments and we cover just about everything before my actual hands-on exams.

At this year's appointment, she did her exam and reacted with alarm when she felt something she hadn't felt before. She checked again, made notes with her nurse and then said that we should talk after I got dressed. When I sat with her a few minutes later, she told me that she wanted me to have an ultrasound and then schedule an appointment to meet with a gynecologist. I left her office a little numb.

I had the ultrasound the next day, a further MRI procedure, and then made the appointment with her recommended gynecologist as soon as possible after that. The gynecologist reviewed the test results, made her own examination and then referred me to a gynecological oncologist in Sarasota the same day. 

If I told you that Handsome and I were nervous, it would be an understatement. We were concerned, and Handsome attended every single examination and conference with every doctor after that initial checkup. He was in the room, holding my hand every step of the way and I'm so grateful he was. Because he heard everything that was said to me, we could discuss what we were told and keep each other from misunderstanding or misinterpreting anything.

The result of all these appointments was that I had major surgery on May 23rd to remove what so concerned three different professionals. We told our family and close friends ahead of the date. I can't tell you how much it meant to me to know that mine were not the only prayers asking for a positive outcome. During the surgery, everything was tested right away. Thankfully, it all proved to be non-malignant and the surgery was concluded without having to do anything else but heal. All of our prayers were answered.

The doctor gave me strict orders to "take it easy" until I'm healed in four weeks. Handsome is taking great care of me, making sure I follow all the instructions we were given. I still tire very easily, but I do try to spend a little time in the studio. I promise to get my blog back to normal just as soon as I'm able.

I'm not telling you all of this now for sympathy or recognition. In fact, had this resolved any other way, I probably wouldn't have posted about it at all. (Remember, this blog is dedicated to Thoughts on a Joyful and Creative Life.) I would have kept the bad news to ourselves.

I want you to know because I had been feeling great prior to my April appointment. I really had no idea that there were things growing inside me that could have been life-threatening. I have gone for my annual appointments every single year since I turned 19...without fail. 

While I've been diligent, I'm aware that there are many women who don't get annual checkups. I would like to encourage you to make an appointment and make sure that you're healthy. It could save your life.

Tuesdays With Tag - Don't Say That Word Again...

Tag trying to sleep in his Kong™ collar.

Is this not the most pathetic picture of me ever?!!! Yeah. It's me. Tag. I had a rough weekend around here. Now I know what "nootered" means, and I don't think I want to do that again! It's not funny! I really don't even want to talk about it, you know?

Mom made me wear this stupid collar for a couple of days. I don't know what the big deal was. I felt a little funny back there and just wanted to check it out. Apparently, checking back there after surgery is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT! Sheesh!

So, look how hard it was to get a good rest in this stupid, puffy collar. The best I could do was use it like a pillow and just give in to it.

Ahhhh. Much better!

I made a deal with Mom. I promised to leave my surgery site alone and she wouldn't make me wear the blue pillow. It was a win/win as far as I could see!

I really am feeling better now. Thank you to everyone who said prayers and sent happy thoughts my way. I'm glad you all helped Mom out while I was a bit under the weather. You really saw her through my adventure. Oh, and I'm really happy my voice didn't get higher. (Mom said that happens sometimes...but not to me!) I still have my "Big Boy" bark! Woof!

Next week I'll be back to my usual silliness. I might even do a "pin-up" photo of you to show you my new, streamlined look! (Not!) Anyway, 'til then...

"More Waggin' and Less Barkin'!"

The Comforts of Home...

I'll be spending today thinking of the comforts of home. I'm having a little surgery to remove a certain organ that had me in the emergency room last Saturday night. It seems that this crafty blogger has been busy making "pearls" (of a sort)...one being the size of a large gumball. So, in an effort to avoid another "frontal assault", we're going to just have the offender removed - lock, stock and barrel. Perhaps that's the reason I've been a bit unfocused lately. I'm going to spend a little time thinking about my next project, work on my beautiful, mint green sweater, and concentrate on healing.

The two books in my photos are recent acquisitions from Anne Sutton at Bunny Hill Designs. One - Home Comforts - I purchased, and the other - Comfort and Joy - was a gift from her. Both are filled with gorgeous designs and ideas. Don't these quilts just make you want to hole up in your sewing room and make 'em all? They do me! Her blog Bunny Hill, is also a wonderful place to visit.

Hope you have a great day - and I always appreciate a healing prayer. I'll write again soon. (I'm writing my post for tomorrow ahead of time. I'll be back "in person" on Friday.)

Running On Auto-Pilot For The Past Few Days...

Thank goodness for a little feature in my bag of blogger tricks that allows me to schedule posts to appear when I want them to. I've been a bit under the weather since Wednesday when I had a much-overdue surgery on my bottom lip. Nothing serious, but a real nuisance when you consider it's smack dab in the middle of my face!

I've needed this surgery for more than a few years, but kept putting it off because the biopsy had me complaining of pain for a full ten days. A person just doesn't forget that! Well, it was time to put on my "big girl panties" and do what needs to be done, so I scheduled the procedure and it was performed this past Wednesday afternoon.

Don't worry. Handsome is taking great care of me. I'm doing better every day and coping with the stitches pretty well. I'll be better than before when this is all over (and again I'm looking forward to having these stitches removed!).

I'll be writing fresh posts very soon, but for now, I'll stay on auto-pilot and concentrate on healing. Don't have too much fun without me, now!

And a little something extra - This really brightened my day yesterday. If you haven't seen it, I think it's great. Hope it brings a smile to your face, too! (just click on these words)